I Cry
by blackfenra
Summary: Yuki made Shuichi leave by cheating on him with Hiro. When Shuichi finally walked away, what are the thoughts that ran on Yuki's mind? And why does he cry?
1. You said goodbye, I fell apart

**Anime/Manga:** GRAVITATION

**Title:** I Cry

**Characters:** Shuichi and Eiri, slight Hiro x Eiri

**Summary:** Yuki made Shuichi leave by cheating on him with Hiro. When Shuichi finally accepted his defeat and turned his back and walked away, why did tears fall from Eiri's eyes?

**DISCLAIMER:** Gravitation is all owned by Ms. Maki Murakami, story and characters included. I just used them for some slight drama. Don't worry, Yuki and Hiro fans out there, I'm not breaking them up here, hehe ^_^V

**AN: **_This is a story based from Shayne Ward's I Cry song. _

**WARNING: YAOI! Boy's Love so if you're not into men loving men, then please don't read. Don't forget to leave reviews and message me. :3 Love to hear what reader's think.**

* * *

**I Cry**

_You said goodbye, I fell apart_

_I fell from all we had_

_To I never knew, I needed you so bad_

"**Shu...**" Eiri couldn't even begin to find the words to say to the pink-haired singer who was busy packing up. Eiri just watched him as he went around the place with all familiarity, hastily picking up his things around the apartment, passing by him in silence. After pulling another an all nighter finishing his next novel, Eiri had no clue what day it was except for one.

It is the morning Shuichi decided he was moving out of the apartment, and out of Eiri's life. And they never even had a chance to talk about anything, feeling it was unnecessary. And the kid didn't press himself too much about it.

"**Yes, Yuki?**" The singer replied coldly without giving him a glance. He was finished with his luggage and now started to give his attention to the boxes which is being filled up with his important stuffs.

**"I-I'm sorry."** Why was he asking this brat's forgiveness? When did he start to care about his feelings? He didn't tell him about his affair with the idiot's best friend, Hiro, if he didn't want him hurt and out of his life. He didn't once love the kid, though he did care a long time ago.

Shuichi's shoulders slumped. **"Please, don't even start asking forgiveness now. It's too late for you to say that at this time."** There was a hint of sarcasm and hate in Shu's voice, which made Eiri flinched for a bit. "**If you're going to be sorry, you should have not done it then.**"

Eiri maintained his cool and returned to his uncaring nature. "**You're right, brat. Why did I bother asking for forgiveness anyway?**"

Shuichi turned and gave him a smile. A smile that never reached his beautiful eyes. A fake smile that will forever haunt Eiri. **"That's right, Yuki. Just stay that way. So that you won't make it any harder for me."**

Eiri sat at the couch and dragged a cigarette out of his pocket. He silently eyed Shuichi while the kid was hopping from room to room, might be checking if he still has some things left. Shu went to the kitchen last, taking with him his favorite strawberry printed mug, and went back straight to the bedroom where his boxes are. Watching Shu, Eiri felt something was wrong with him. He felt really unusual, a feeling that he can't recognize.

Suddenly, there was a knock on the door. Eiri remained seated, he was not interested to open his door for anyone at this hour. The doorbell rang for seconds, indicating that whoever was out the door is being impatient. Shuichi peered through the bedroom door and glared at him. **"Yuki, why don't you be nice to me for the last time and open it for me? The noise is becoming annoying."**

Eiri furrowed his brows in confusion. When did this kid become foul-mouthed?

_From the moment you cheated and betrayed on him,_ a voice rang through Eiri's mind. He sluggishly stood up from the couch and went towards the door. He violently opened it and find that it was the movers Shu called. He let them in anyway.

"**Brat, the movers are here.**" He called out to Shu.

The movers were fast to collect Shuichi's things, luggages and all, out of his door. Shuichi went out last, his backpack securely slung on his shoulder blades, after checking that there was nothing forgotten to come back to. But before he got out of the door, Shuichi stared at Eiri for one last time.

"**Well, I hope you have a good life.**"

Eiri smirked. "**I am sure that Hiro would be providing me that life, brat.**" _Nice one, Eiri. Why do you have to say that at this moment?_ The blonde author thought. But he was still in awe how the brat could still say those words to him when he just betrayed him? He would have never mind if Shuichi hated him enough to curse the world.

Shuichi smiled sadly. "**I know, and I am glad that even if you didn't love me, at least it was Hiro you fell in love with. I can be sure you're taken care of. Hiro's good at that. Taking care of people."**

Eiri felt guilty. How can Shuichi be like this? Why doesn't he get angry? Why does he always say the most strangest things? How can he still remain sweet and innocent? But if Shuichi won't go, he can't have a life with Hiro. He's been asking this for a long time now, to the point that he could have been the one to leave the brat.

Eiri raised a brow. "**Oh? You're glad now?**"

Shuichi's expression didn't hide his pain. "**If I get angry, will that change anything and everything?**"

The novelist was shocked at that brief but hurtful reply from Shu. "**No, I still would choose him even if you throw a fit, brat."**

Shuichi's eyes looked away from him, clutching in his grasp the strap of his backpack. "**Then, that pretty settle much everything. I can't be Hiro, that's why you can't choose me.**"

Silence.

The pink-haired singer offered his lithe hand. "**Thank you for the times you've shared with me. I won't forget those, both bad and good ones.**"

Eiri reluctantly accepted Shu's hands. "**Yeah. I know you won't be able to forget me. You love me too much.**" He smirked back at Shuichi. He know there was truth with what he just told the brat.

That comment made Shuichi laugh. "**Such overconfidence, Yuki.**" After the brief handshake, Shuichi took a deep breath. Their eyes met for a moment. And then Shuichi moved closer and before Eiri knew it, he was locked in a tight grip.

"**I will be missing you so much, Yuki... Please let me hold you like this, just for a minute."** Shuichi said with so much sadness that made Eiri unconsciously wrapped his arms around the singer's small waist. "**Hold me for just one last time..."**

"**Brat.**" Eiri heard little sobs escaping from the singer. He can tell he was starting to cry once again. Even in the last moment, all he did was make Shuichi cry. He didn't give a damn about it before, but there was something tugging at his heart for Shu. Eiri was so sure he won't be missing the brat, but he's not doubting his decisions now right?

Shuichi broke the embrace and without warning, locked his lips with Eiri. Eiri was caught offguard but decided to give in, after all it will be the _**LAST TIME**._ They stayed that way for another minute, kissing like the first time since their meeting, passionately exploring each other's mouth. Shu was the first one who broke the kiss, his flushed face covered with tears.

"**Thank you for the memories, Yuki. No... maybe I'd be able to say your name properly right now. You'll let me, right? I will regret it later if I don't say it."  
**

Eiri didn't reply but waited for whatever Shu has left to say. But Shu just reached for his face and caressed it with his familiar gentleness, the touch of love. "**Goodbye, Eiri... and I love you.**" Shuichi held his hand, kissed it and slowly let go.

Before Eiri could say anything, Shuichi turned his back already and walked hurriedly towards the elevator. Eiri took in the last sight of Shuichi near him, his heart now aching.

"**Shuichi...**"

And when Shuichi was gone out of his sight, Eiri let himself drop to the floor, tears starting to flow uncontrollably in his almond eyes. Tears of happiness, right?

His wish just came true.

He's free.

* * *

**AN2: How about reviews? I'd love to hear what you think, too! Aw, it hurts when someone says goodbye. I edited this chapter for more. I don't think just simple sentences suffice for me :3  
**


	2. You need to let things go, I know

**Anime/Manga:** GRAVITATION

**Title:** I Cry

**Characters:** Shuichi and Eiri, slight Hiro x Eiri

**Summary:** Yuki made Shuichi leave by cheating on him with Hiro. When Shuichi finally accepted his defeat and turned his back and walked away, why did tears fall from Eiri's eyes?

**DISCLAIMER:** Gravitation is all owned by Ms. Maki Murakami, story and characters included. I just used them for some slight drama. Don't worry, Yuki and Hiro fans out there, I'm not breaking them up here, hehe ^_^V

**AN: **_This is a story based from Shayne Ward's I Cry song.I just wanted to write a story where everything reminds Yuki of Shuichi, at least putting an emphasis that the boy has been ingrained in him, just like Kitazawa, though in a different matter. :3  
_

**WARNING: YAOI! Boy's Love so if you're not into men loving men, then please don't read. Don't forget to leave reviews and message me. :3 Love to hear what reader's think.**

* * *

**I Cry**

_You need to let things go, I know_

_You told me so._

_I've been through hell_

_To break the spell._

Eiri unconsciously ran his hands on the empty side of his bed, feeling the lingering warmth of his ex-lover. Last night, when another nightmare woke him up, he then turned to hug his dream catcher like he used to, only to remember that it was long gone. Night after night, his nightmares haunt him, starting on the first night Shuichi went away. Hiro has yet to move in with him and until then, he had to once again but be alone. Dealing with his terrifying dreams on his own is just too much, he lost his will to take a nap or sleep and it greatly affected his writing.

He tugged the pillow beside him, only to inhale the strawberry scent that reminded him of Shuichi, the brat who walked out on him a week ago. He corrected his thoughts. He was the one who made Shu leave. When his nostrils caught the familiar fragrance, he felt safe. Hiro made him felt safe too, but Shuichi does it better when his dreams gets the worst of him. Aside from being his dream catcher, Shu would sing to him until he could sleep again, the singer's gentle voice sending him to Dreamland. Shu can calm in him the strongest of the storms, even if he doesn't do the same to him.

The author got out of bed and went straight to the bathroom. Even in the confines of the shower, Shu's scent filled the air. As if he was still there.

"_Yuki~ Let's take a bath together!_"

Shuichi's voice infiltrated the room, making Eiri look at the unoccupied bath tub, where Shu would usually play with his aromatic bubble bath, grinning from ear to ear, all the while singing. He would always tell him to shut up or make him shut up by doing the things he knew will silenced the singer. He snickered to himself. Why are the thoughts of Shu so dominant even in his waking moments? He should be forgetting the brat, after all he has Hiro now. He hurriedly finished his shower.

"_Yuki~ I wrote a new song!_"

Eiri had to pass by the living room to the bedroom. He stopped dead in his tracks when he heard the all too familiar voice. Was it all in his head? Damn, he must still be dreaming. He scanned the room with his eyes, memories coming back. The television set, which could have just been another one of his unused appliances as he doesn't watch anything much, is now reminding him of the pink-haired brat. The couch, the carpeted floor, the empty rack which housed Shu's stereo and Nittle Grasper collection from before, damn even the sliding glass door towards the veranda associated themselves with his ex-lover. Eiri was now pissed off, as he mentally noted himself that it was his things that's in there, not Shuichi's. He owned every single fucking thing in that space, but why is that brat's face glued on each and every surface?

"_Yuki~ Can I sleep with you?_"

Eiri is now in the bedroom. He opened his closet and took a pair of white polo and black slacks, the usual outfit when he is at home. But when he looked at the empty space at the other side of the mahogany furniture, he once again remembered Shuichi. That space is where Shu's stage costumes are usually hung, with his casual clothes folded messily at the bottom part. And soon, it would be Hiro's space. Some dust are now accumulated on the empty racks, with Eiri reminding himself to clean it up before Hiro moves in. He turned his attention to the bed. Smoothly folding the crumpled blanket, he noticed the pink and violet stripes in it.

_Ha! The brat forgot his blanket! And what's with the color? Is he Rapunzel or something?  
_

But something in the blanket made him feel comfortable. Calm, even. The pink reminded him of the singer's beautiful tresses while the violet made him remember the singer's eyes, things that made Shu unforgettable. After neatly fixing the bed, which he would be sharing with Hiro soon, the novelist exited the door and went straight to his kitchen to fix himself some quick breakfast, coffee and nicotine.

"_Yuki~ I'm starving..."_

Now, Eiri needed more nicotine intake than ever before. Exiting the kitchen, he went straight to his study.

"_Yuki~ what are you doing?_"

"**DAMN IT, BRAT! STOP CALLING ME!**" Eiri slammed his fist on his desk. He needed silence. He had to finish his manuscript quick and deliver it later to his editor. But the thoughts of Shuichi is blocking any possible way for ideas to start running. He was glad that no one was disturbing him, no one to slam the door open and strangle him in a neck-breaking embrace. And he was just as happy that he was able to finish two manuscripts within a week. Ha! He didn't care if the brat left, he was more than willing to pay him to move out and go somewhere he can't see or hear him. But why is that the printer's noise made him feel bothered?

"_Yuki~ I'm going to work now!_"

Eiri was about to go out the door. Even the entrance of his unit made him feel nauseous. He remembered the day the brat left, the last hug, the last touch, the last kiss they've shared. No, he felt nothing for that. Maybe, a little bit of guilt or he was just sorry for the brat, but yes, there wasn't anything more to it. Eiri clenched his fist tightly as he could. Because he remembered the day when Shuichi finally turned his back away from him, away from the memories of them. The last goodbye. And the way he sadly spoke his name.

"_Farewell,_ _Eiri..._"

Eiri slowly walked towards the elevator. He took a cigarette from his coat's pocket and his lighter. But he stopped to stare at his silver lighter, the picture of him and the brat from their first date still there. He would throw that lighter, and soon he will be free from the brat's memory. He don't need him anymore. Hiro will be there by his side soon.

Shuichi has already let go of him. He should be doing that, too. For the best. For them.

The brat was cruel as well. He set off a curse where one Eiri Uesugi can't get out.

* * *

That night, Eiri took his Walkman to the bedroom, plugged his earphones and pressed the Play button. An angel's voice started singing to Eiri, serenading him. He drifted to sleep, unknowing of the single teardrop that fell from his eyes.

_When an orange-colored moonlit night comes, I think of you,  
_

_as though the chic affectations in my words were someone else's words._

_Even now, I can remember the pale light_

_that illuminated your silhouette as you suddenly glanced up at that night's sky.  
_

_What is it I'm waiting for, in this room without you?  
_

_it's just the clock's ticking, but it resonates in my sleepless heart like the sound of footsteps.  
_

_Even now I'm waiting; I stop here alone.  
_

_From where do you now see the moon we saw together on that day?_

_My behavior made a mimicry of laughter, even when I remember your voice. _

_The scene of the night when we walked around together is now an orange-colored photograph._

_You forgave the lies that fell from the darkness and my selfishness,  
_

_but your tears, even now..._

_Without saying a word, time flows on;  
_

_the sky is extinguished by the light of the morning that's coming soon, like it melts away.  
_

_On that last night, no matter where it is,  
_

_only the moon looks at my deserted heart even now._

Eiri murmured softly in his sleep._ "Brat, why do you haunt me?"_

_"I love you, Yuki~"_

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_**AN: The song was "In the Moonlight" in English lyrics. It was perfectly beautiful and haunting at the same time. Hope that my readers/viewers would like it! This is already edited version. **  
_


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